Been sick and when I am sick my brain does not formulate good sentences, hence the absence of blogtime. Now, at the end of this lovely illness, I am in the cough phase, where every time I try to talk, hacks come out instead of words. So I decided to write instead of hack. Though you have not missed much, I DID find out good news today. Let me give the back story though. We submitted our second background clearance (since agencies can not share background check info) the first week in January. Two weeks later I asked if they had heard back, because it took 2 weeks with our previous #adoptionagency. She said they had not and I asked her to please let me know when we were approved so I could check that off my list before investing any more money into anything before we are certain. HEY, YOU NEVER KNOW if anything happened in the months between the first and second background check. Maybe I stole some donuts! OK, yes, we know we would be approved, but I can not move forward until I actually SEE something in writing. I have learned the hard way, nothing is valid unless it is in writing! With SOME exceptions, like when I tell hubs I will not interrupt his guitar jams with my intense version of Part of Your World. Anyway...I write to our agency today asking if we should contact the state to see what the hold up is and she responds, "We got the background checks back, are you done your profile book for review?" OHHHHH OK THANKS FOR LETTING US KNOW SWEET CHEECKS! See, I was so annoyed there I added an extra c to sweet cheeks! OK, I wasn't THAT annoyed, but I specifically asked her to let us know when they came in...doesn't she have hot pink post-its or a to do list, or that little reminder in your brain when you see someones name on something you get and you just you tell them? I know, I know, we are all human, it isn't a huge deal, but would have been nice to have known. Ya, obviously not that annoyed ;)
Man, this MyMemories #Scrapbooking is becoming too fun and addicting. And my OCD is going so insane that I think I will never finish. There is always a better green color, a more precious family tree with hearts and a fancier swirly font! Now that the background check is through, though, I will have to just give it up and "start the finish". We still are going to get a cover photo taken then all we have to do is write our precious lil story about our love and life and all that jazz and add the rest of the captions. And the #birthmotherletter. If you are not familiar, you usually submit a letter or a letter that is part of your book talking to the birth mothers who are reviewing your books. Usually you tell them how brave their decision is, how you have ached for children for x months/years (which is true minus the pooh and future sleepless nights) and what you have to offer their future bean, that could one day be your future bean. YAY for a family of beans! Beans, beans, good for your heart!
Advice on writing birth mother letters? From what I have read and heard, checking out some online (widely available, they are even on pinterest!), and grabbing way back into your ol beater and grabbing your empathy, just FEELING, not thinking about what she is going through, and writing a compassionate letter, not what you think they want to hear. And then, when talking about yourself, write what you think they want to hear. Jokes, jokes...just be real, as if you were talking to a friend about why you can't wait to have a child, what you think that will look like, what you can offer and how excited you are. It seems a fine line because on one hand you feel sadness for them, yet excitement for yourself. There is a whole mix of emotions in this adoption land and they are in it too, and they understand, and they want you to be excited because they want parents for their child to love them as much as they do/will. Never play down their feelings and never play down your own! We are all in it together. UNITED WE STAND! Oh wait, wrong speech.
Unusually Hungry for Beans,
Bumpless Baby Mama
No comments:
Post a Comment